In my vain life I have seen everything. There is a righteous man who perishes in his righteousness, and there is a wicked man who prolongs his life in his evildoing. Be not overly righteous, and do not make yourself too wise. Why should you destroy yourself? Be not overly wicked, neither be a fool. Why should you die before your time? 

Ecclesiastes 7:16-17, ESV

In my newfound faith in God after my conversion as a teenager (I’ve shared my story here), my intense desire was to please God and to be like Jesus. Holiness now appeared to me, not as a dry and burdensome duty devoid of happiness and pleasure, but as a beautiful, powerful, free and joyful state, something that I longed to have. Growing up in a church that emphasized obedience to God’s law and our responsibility to co-operate with God in achieving salvation and holiness, I was determined to do my part. I confessed my sins to God in prayer and anxiously strove to keep myself from sinning in thought or action.

Years later, however, I was burned out. My pursuit of holiness had been such a roller coaster between heaven and hell, between triumph and failure, that I felt like I was about to lose my sanity. I was riddled with anxiety and eventually felt the darkness of depression and despair envelope me. My mental health was suffering in my spiritual pursuit. It was at this point that I began to understand the aforementioned verse in Ecclesiastes.

What does it mean to be “overly righteous”, and why is it harmful?

Self-centered spirituality drives extremism. A perpetual concern with our own righteousness breeds hatred. It’s a form of self-centeredness that over time develops a destructive hatred toward your human self and/or other human beings. An obsession with your own faults and moral failures will lead you to mistreat yourself by harshly condemning and pronouncing judgment on yourself as being worthless and hopeless. When you are not obsessing about your own faults, you will obsess over the faults of others, pronouncing judgment on other people who do not live up to your standards. Thus, you begin to hate people and mistreat them. The self-aware person will be plagued with inward anxiety, guilt and shame, while the person lacking self-awareness will manifest an accusing, proud and judgmental spirit toward others.

Therefore you have no excuse, O man, every one of you who judges. For in passing judgment on another you condemn yourself, because you, the judge, practice the very same things.

Romans 2:1, ESV

Here the saying “it takes one to know one” rings true. In my own striving for holiness, I would be quick to judge those who did not live up to my standards. While I did not murder anyone physically, my lack of compassion and my harsh words toward other “sinners” were no less destructive than that of a murderer. In my obsession over my own sins, I would obsess over and magnify the sins of others. In trying to disown and distance myself from my own sins, I would distance myself from those that I deemed to be sinners. And finally, I broke under this heavy and isolating burden.

Living under the law or under grace. I had to lose my mental health in order to realize the real danger and harm of being “overly righteous”. I realized that by focusing on my own righteousness, I was living “under the law”, as the apostle Paul warned against (Galatians 2-3). Since God’s law condemns sin and sinners, the law naturally triggers a self-centered fear in us all since we all are sinners, even when we strive to be righteous. Despite our very best efforts to do right, “we all stumble in many ways” and “we all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (James 3:2, ESV; Romans 3:23, ESV). Being sinners, we in ourselves never reach up to God’s perfect standard as expressed in the law. Living under the paradigm of law therefore naturally leads us into a vicious cycle of condemnation, shame, guilt, and a fear-driven obsession with self. “Am I good enough? Have I done enough? Am I a good person? Am I worthy? Am I accepted?” Living under the law leads to the slavery of self-centeredness.

God’s grace as given through Jesus, however, breaks this vicious cycle. Living under the paradigm of grace means to believe that Christ’s sacrifice and intercession covers all my sins and faults, and that I stand forgiven, perfect and fully accepted before God as if I never sinned. Christ’s perfect character is freely accounted to me because I acknowledge my own sins and shortcomings, my need for forgiveness and salvation, and because I have accepted Christ into my heart as my Savior and Teacher. Living under this paradigm of grace sets me free from the fear of not being “good enough” for God, and therefore also sets me free from being obsessed with myself and my faults. Through Christ, I am accepted as I am.

When we realize that we are freely and fully accepted by God through faith in Jesus Christ, all fear of judgment is cast out. Love begins to spring up in the heart. The slavery of selfishness and sin is powered by fear—fear of not being loved or cared for by anyone else than yourself. God’s love and free gift frees me from this fear and gives me the ability to grow in unselfishness and love toward others. Because I am truly loved and eternally cared for by God, I am able to truly love and care for others.

Conclusion. As I see it, being “overly righteous” means living under the paradigm of law and the fear of condemnation and death. This mentality naturally inhibits the nobler human qualities, such as love, compassion, forgiveness, patience, and empathy. These are the healing and transforming qualities in the message about Jesus, and these qualities are vital for our mental, social and spiritual health and development.

That is why I think many Christians would be better Christians if they cited Ecclesiastes 7:16-17 more often.

This is my testimony. What is yours? Feel free to share in the comment section below!